1 John 4:18

There is no fear in love [dread does not exist]. But perfect (complete, full-grown) love drives out fear, because fear involves [the expectation of divine] punishment, so the one who is afraid [of God’s judgment] is not perfected in love [has not grown into a sufficient understanding of God’s love].

1 John 4:17 

¹⁷ In this [union and fellowship with Him], love is completed and perfected with us, so that we may have confidence in the day of judgment [with assurance and boldness to face Him]; because as He is, so are we in this world.

No Fear of God’s Judgement

Within the context of 1 John chapter 4, John the Apostle is specifically saying that those who have achieved perfect love in God will have no worries on Judgement Day when you stand to give account of the deeds done on earth (Romans 14:10 ). Why? Because the fear that anticipates punishment has been eradicated by perfected love.

The Point: Perfect love casts out the fear of God’s judgement.

Perfect Love – What is it?

The short answer is God is Perfect Love.

Note: Since Jesus Christ is God wrapped in flesh, I freely interchange the use of God and Jesus Christ.

God is perfect.

The scripture says God’s ways are perfect.

Psalm 18:30

³⁰As for God, His way is blameless.
The word of the Lord is tested [it is perfect, it is faultless]….

God’s will is perfect. 

Romans 12:2

² And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

God is love.

1 John 4:8

⁸The one who does not love does not know God, because God is love.

To conclude, God, that is, Jesus Christ is perfect love. And if that perfect love resides in us as the Holy Spirit (John 14:16-18), then we have perfect love, right? .

Not necessarily. It depends on if you’ve made Jesus the tenant of your heart or the Landlord.

Making Jesus Christ the Landlord

Let’s get straight to the matter.

#1 God must have all of you.

You must love God with your all or not at all.

Mark 12

³⁰ And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul (life), and with all your mind (thought, understanding), and with all your strength: this is the first commandment

#2 If you love God, you will keep his commandments.

1 John 2:5
⁵But whoever habitually keeps His word and obeys His precepts [and treasures His message in its entirety], in him the love of God has truly been perfected [it is completed and has reached maturity]. By this we know [for certain] that we are in Him:

God’s commandments reveal His will, His very nature, who He is, what He likes and doesn’t like. And if you love Him, you’ll strive to please Him by doing what He likes. Many feel it is a burden to love God because of what it requires but truly don’t you put in similar effort to win and keep your spouse? Wasn’t there effort expended to win and keep your love? Or did you fall for and accept anything? Don’t think so!

Perfect Love Pleases

I was having a discussion with my mother one day and I asked her,

“You’ve said on several occasions, ‘The family knows how you are.’ “

I had let the statement go many times before but that day I decided to find out just what she meant by ‘ the family knows how you are.’

The bottom line to that declaration by my mother is that I operate by ways that are particular to me, i.e., my principles and mannerisms.

I’m an introvert by gift of nature and as a hostess I tend to be rather uptight and fastidious. For example, after a family dinner when everyone is sitting around enjoying each other’s company, I can’t join them comfortably until the dishes are done. If I joined them I would be half listening, providing  a complementary laugh now and then as my gaze wanders to the sink of growing pile of dishes. I would anticipate the ache in my feet when I’m finally done with the kitchen later that night. Oh boy!

Guess Who’s Coming for Dinner

Remember the story when Jesus was at Mary and Martha’s house for dinner (Luke 10:38-42) Martha was flinging pots and pans; droplets of perspiration probably dotted her forehead. Then there was Mary, her head propped on her hands while she sat criss-cross applesauce at Jesus’ feet. Of course, Martha complains to Jesus saying she needs some help. But Jesus’ response wasn’t at all what she’d hoped. Jesus told Martha that Mary had chosen the ‘good part.’

Now guess which one of the two, Mary or Martha, I would be? I would be Martha, all day. I wish I could say I would be Mary at his feet but honestly, I’d be running around trying to get things ready because people were hungry. My thought in response to Jesus’ defense of Mary would have been, “And I can’t get no help Jesus?” 

Of course, we do know the moral of the story…better to eat at Jesus’ table and get food everlasting than at Martha’s where the food decays. I know Lord, I get it.

Perfect love in my hostess story would have been to fellowship with my family, giving them my undivided attention just as Mary sought to fellowship with the humanity and deity of Christ. ‘Knowing how I am’, perfect love on their part may have been to continue the fellowship while helping to clean the kitchen. Perfect love is in touch with the sensitivities of individuals and takes actions to facilitate their comfort.

As we each have our ways and are known by them, so does God.  If you love Him, you would learn His ways; His ways are reflected in His commandments which reflect His will.  Whether they are agreeable to you or not, if you love Him, you will do them.

#3 We must love one another.

1 John 4:12
¹²No one has seen God at any time. But if we love one another [with unselfish concern], God abides in us, and His love [the love that is His essence abides in us and] is completed and perfected in us.

In other words, it isn’t necessary that people actually see God but yet they do see God if the love of God has been perfected in us. The perfected love of God is the unshakeable evidence that the Spirit of God lives in us.

You can speak in tongues (1 Corinthians 14:4-6 ) until the cows come home that is still no evidence the perfected love of God lives in you. Tongues can be faked. I can rattle tongues and tear up the church in praise but one cannot sustain counterfeit love as perfected love. The real bloke is going to come out. Perfect love is eternal. Tongues will cease but perfect love won’t.

1 Corinthians 13:8-10,13

⁸ Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. 

⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 

¹⁰ but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away.

¹³ So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

To summarize, the evidence of perfected love in us is,

#1 Loving God with all your heart, mind and soul.

#2 Keeping His commandments.

#3 Loving others as you love yourself.

If you embrace all these components as a matter of practice, it is certain your biased, conditional based love will evolve into perfect love. A love that does not fear standing before the judgement seat of Christ.

More Good News

That same love that remediates fear of divine judgement remediates fear of man’s judgement. You may puff out your chest and huff,

“I’m not fearful of man’s judgements or criticisms. I govern my life by my own standards.”

In everything? Do you really?

Fear of Man’s Judgement

Now that we talked about escaping the fear of God’s judgement, what about escaping the fear of man’s judgement?

Man’s judgement assigns categories and labels that inflate or deflate the ego. The danger in placing too much emphasis on these assignments lies in the scale man uses. It is most certainly biased and fickle. One should be cautious when measuring their worth with someone else’s ruler.

However, we do live under a cloud of judges that impact our lives daily.

Win or Lose – There’s Judgement

We homosapiens are competitive. We strive to outdo what we did last time or outdo each other in pursuit of the congratulatory ‘pat’ on the head.  From a positive perspective, if it wasn’t for that drive we wouldn’t have experienced the industrial revolution which brought us from the fields to the factories, from the horse and buggy to automobiles, from ground travel to air and space travel, from horse and rider to the cell phone and internet.

In recognition of the pursuit to exceed, we’ve created certificates, ribbons, trophies, awards, scholarships, positions, etc. to present to the “best in class”. When the giver of accolades presents the award there are a lot of “losers” in the wake.

Being a “loser” propagates not only the anxiety of the loss but the fear of judgement and subjective opinions. The loser prepares for this moment by putting on their best face, pulling out their concession response and then retreating to the point farthest away from the place of their loss. But what remains with them is their anxiety and fear of man’s-imposed judgement (assessment).

 I dare say even a by-product of the winner is also fear. They are fearful of the next time they are required to turn it on, they will fall short of expectations, their own and others.

Judgement of Self and Relationships

In relationships (serious or casual) fear is a built-in component in imperfect love. Fear of comparisons which result in fear of unfaithfulness and abandonment.

In parenting the fear of not being a good parent so you give more than you had growing up. At times catapulting them to a maturity they haven’t yet achieved by allowing them to make decisions that should be reserved for parents.

There is fear of what others will say about your body type, your hair, your face or complexion.

Fear of man’s judgement can be elevated to self-doubt. Why? Because we have attached ourselves to and elevated man’s opinion higher than the love God has for us.

Other People’s Perception of You Ain’t None of Your Business – Lisa Nichols

Judgment in Secular and Religious Entities

In all industries there is constant fear a co-worker will get the one upsmanship on the job thereby lowering their value.

In ministry, fear of modesty causes factions to compare themselves to one another making ministry growth not one of souls added to the kingdom but of members added to the roll.

The perfect love that casts out fear of God’s judgement can also cast out the fear of man’s judgements.

Man’s judgement may label you “less than” or “not as good as“ or if positive it it may only be as the  “flavor of the month”. We take these judgements to heart and become disheartened and fearful of our next move.

The Truth Shall Set You Free

Biblical Truth:  Perfect love casts out fear.

Having then accepted this as truth, it becomes a postulate by which we can extrapolate other truths.

1 John 4:18 

¹⁸There is no fear in love But perfect (complete, full-grown) love drives out fear, because fear involves punishment, so the one who is afraid is not perfected in love [has not grown into a sufficient understanding of God’s love].

Extrapolation:

1. Fear of man’s judgement cannot co-exist with perfect love

1 John 4:17 

¹⁷ In this [union and fellowship with Him], love is completed and perfected with us, so that we may have confidence in the day of judgment; because as He is, so are we in this world.

Extrapolation:

2. Love perfected in us allows us to become the reflection of God. As He is in Heaven, so are we on Earth.

First, let’s look at fear co-existing with love.

The Physiology of Love and Fear

Love and Fear are roommates. They reside in the region of the brain called the amygdala. In fact, the amygdala is responsible for multiple emotions like love, fear, anger all other emotional responses.

Traumatic Memories Trigger Fear

The hippocampus region of the brain is the repository for our memories. When a memory is triggered the hippocampus sends the encapsulated memory to the amygdala which immediately emits the emotion tied to that memory.

The prefrontal cortex actionizes the emotion, be it love or fear. In other words, it decides on the action to take in direct response to the emotion felt.

https://www.livestrong.com/article/77419-parts-human-brain-correspond-emotion/

Now that it is established that love and fear live together, how can perfect love drive out fear as stated in 1 John 4:18?

Serving the Eviction

The key to perfect love casting out fear, physiologically speaking, lies in the prefrontal cortex. Remember the prefrontal cortex takes the emotional signal, in this case fear or love, from the amygdala and places an action around it. Typical impulse actions to fear are fight, flight or freeze. Can these impulse actions be changed? No, they are hardwired to fear. So what must change is the emotion associated with that trauma.

Note: From here forward the word judgement will be used in place of the word trauma.

When fear is transmitted to the prefrontal cortex perfected love must intercept and replace the fear. Upon arrival at the prefrontal cortex, love not fear will be actionized.

One thing that cannot be changed is the initial judgement however insignificant it may seem to others. The memory and its triggers are real. One can work to clarify the judgement, i.e., place it in perspective thus reducing its effect. However, unaddressed judgements have a way of simulating the story of the man who caught a fish. Each time the man tells the story, the fish gets bigger and bigger. As the length of time grows between the judgement and addressing it, the more dastardly and the more indispensable that booga-man gets.

So the judgement can’t be undone but it can have its wings clipped.

Clipping Its Wings

The point of clipping its wings is that yes, it’s still there, but it can’t take flight.

1. Place the source of judgement in perspective considering their motivation.
2. Acknowledge and be thankful for the physical, intellectual and spiritual gifts God gave you.
3. Say your name and understand who you are in Christ.

All of these actions when done consistently and repetitively help to reprogram the amygdala to send love to intercept the fear that comes with judgement. So instead of the prefrontal cortex actionizing fear, love is actionized. Voila!

This is not possible through your simple love but it is possible through perfected love. Instead of cringing when you think of the bullies you encountered as a child or an adult, exchange that fear by looking into the heart of the bullies. Bullies are often battered individuals with nothing to be proud of. They are deprived so they want to deprive others. If you can look past them and see their stories you won’t fear you’d love.

 As He Is So Are We

Perfect love is God’s love flowing out through us. When we love we construct dams and adjust how much we let out, who gets the flow, and who doesn’t.  We regulate and channel the flow when it is our love. That’s because Christ is our tenant and not the Landlord of our hearts. When God is the Landlord, love is free flowing and it hits everyone. That’s why there is no fear in perfected love. It flows out without respect of person.

Water has a way of going beyond the surfaces it touches. It will be absorbed if the surface is porous. If the surface it lands on is hard it rolls under and around covering surfaces you can’t see. Perfect love is the same when it flows. It is absorbed by those that love in return and for those hard hearted when your love hits them it appears to roll off. But looking closely perfect love continues to make entry and impact by seeping into areas of their heart they will not reveal to you. Maybe because that area of their heart is not even known to them yet. So, in love we are God, we are his conduit to the world and there is no fear in perfect love.

Actions of Perfect Love

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

⁴ Love endures with patience and serenity, love is kind and thoughtful, and is not jealous or envious; love does not brag and is not proud or arrogant. 

⁵ It is not rude; it is not self-seeking, it is not provoked [nor overly sensitive and easily angered]; it does not take into account a wrong endured. 

⁶ It does not rejoice at injustice, but rejoices with the truth [when right and truth prevail]. 

⁷ Love bears all things [regardless of what comes], believes all things [looking for the best in each one], hopes all things [remaining steadfast during difficult times], endures all things [without weakening].

Perfected Love in us is,

• Built on trust and assigns no ill intent to offenses. If there is ill-intent, it forgives
• Spiritual maturity; walking in the spirit
• Deliberately finishes last to give another the joy of finishing first
• Seeks to restore instead of destroy
• Stands for right even if standing alone
• Does not take advantage of the weaker because you can
• Self-values without the need to diminish another’s value
• Not naturally intuitive by man’s standards but if practiced it will become perfect

When Christ’s love matures in you, your love is perfected and the fear of God and man’s judgement is dissolved.

Perfected love remediates not only fear but all the negative emotions one would feel and assign an action to… anger, jealousy, bitterness, resentment, etc.

Remember to,

Target the source, look past their offense to see their story (hurt people hurt) and allow the perfected love to release forgiveness. The flow of its love will in turn heal you.